Did this to myself.

I can sit here and just talk about how sad I am, but it's my fault. I just let the only person I've ever loved go. That was literally the hardest thing I've ever done. But it was for the better. For the better because people are bitches. For the better because I'm psycho. For the better because he doesn't deserve this. 

And so I finished my journal on him today. This wasn't the happy ending I wanted, but the story was more than I could have ever hoped for.