Coping.

I just want everything to go back to the way it was. How am I supposed to see him without wanting to just bury myself in his arms? I can't. For the past couple days I wrote stuff ALL OVER my script while I was in the tech booth. Ive almost filled a notebook, finished the journal, and practiced every song I would need for the next year. I've ran an hour each night and basically just used that time to talk to myself. I've been going to bed early so I didn't have to think.. 

I'm a wreck. I know I'm in high school. And I don't know what "love" is. And there's soooo many other guys out there. But come on. This was different and everyone knew that. Everyone KNOWS that. Ethan apologized. Bailey kind of apologized. The two main people- they knew. If I wasn't such an idiot, we'd be okay.